RAD Radios Real Men Dont List

RAD Radio’s “Real Men Don’t…” List

Accept spousal support

Allow their sons to keep trophies for anything other than 1st place

Become feminists

Belong to a Men’s Rights Activist group.

Blow kisses.

Blow their nose… they blow snot rockets.

Bring a mitt to a baseball game

Bring or welcome women to man-time like Poker games, Loyal Order of Water Buffaloes Meetings or anything in between

Call other men “just to talk.”

Carry a man purse or wear a fanny pack

Change diapers

Chew flavored tobacco

Choose the urinal next to one that is already being used unless there are no other choices

Cope with life.

Cry other than the three times already allowed (Death of your parent, child or dog, when you retire from any level of athletic career, and during the movie “Field of Dreams.”).

Cry over physical pain, ever

Cuddle with other men

Cut their sandwiches or burgers in half

Dab their thingy after going to the bathroom.

Dance with their hands in the air.

Do crafts.

Do yoga

Dress their dogs…ever, for any reason

Drink anything traditionally served with an umbrella

Drink milk.

Drive a sports car with an automatic transmission

Drive minivans

Drive with both hands on the wheel.

Eat fish at a steakhouse

Eat pizza with ranch dressing.

Engage in casual and/or “carefree” locker room nakedness

Engage in shmoopy talk around other men.

Ever admit that they’ve done anything on this list.

Ever experiment with or become a vegetarian

Ever need to ask which teams are playing

Ever purchase an extended warranty

Ever ride as the passenger on a motorcycle. That’s why it’s called “riding bitch.”

Ever say “eek,” or “Tee-hee.” Nor do they LOL, OMG or any other acronym that is girly, nor do they use emoticons

Ever watch the movie “The Notebook”

Fantasy football.

Find female comedians funny

Freak out about age milestones (“Eeek, I’m the big 3-0)

Get cosmetic procedures.

Get Flu shots

Get massages from other men

Get their belly buttons pierced.

Go green

Go into nursing

Go to a bed and breakfast.

Go to showers, baby, bridal or otherwise

Go to the dentist. Brush the pain away

Go to therapy

Have a 3-way with another man

Have a bucket list.

Have food allergies

Have fruity screensavers.

Have life coaches.

Jump for joy.

Keep love notes and/or cards


Know what a fedora is.

Know what quinoa is.

Let a woman BBQ

Let anyone change a tire for them

Let the woman drive when they’re in the same car

Listen to Coldplay

Live at home with their parents after the age of 18

Need to be told, “Never hit a woman.”

Own stupid animals

Participate in any manner in stupid sports

Participate in Christmas caroling or flash mobs

Participate in Live Action Role Play.

Participate in themed weddings.

Pat down pizza grease off with a napkin.

Play frisbee golf.

Pole dance.

Post a Facebook status about how depressing his day or life is

Power walk

Put fruit in their beer

Put stuffed animals on their bed

Refer to their wife as “the boss.”


Ride in cars with window stickers paying tribute to their family.


Run on the field to check on their son.

Run to get out of the rain.

Sanitize anything.

Say they have “never seen the Expendables.”


Send baby pictures to other men.

Shade themselves from the heat

Share their feelings

Shave their legs

Sit in a hot tub or sauna with other men

Sit in the car while a woman fills the gas tank

Sponsor starving kids in Africa

Take cushions to work, school, or sporting events.  If the seat is too hard for your little bottom, don’t go.

Take paternity leave

Take selfies

Take their kids on play dates with other men.

Take their wife’s last name

Think it’s funny to say that “real men don’t need lists.”

Throw their porn away when their girlfriend moves in.

Use a diary

Use a straw

Use blankets to keep warm at sporting events.

Use Pinterest.

Use Sensodyne toothpaste

Use the term “date night.”

Use the term “making love.”

Use the term “bromance”

Use tissues.

Use wet wipes on their butts.

Wash their hands after going to the bathroom.

Watch women’s sports.

Wear a costume

Wear a hat while the national anthem is being performed

Wear earplugs at a concert.

Wear gloves while weightlifting

Wear make-up

Wear pajamas.

Wear pink

Wear skinny jeans

Wear socks and sandals at the same time

When grilling, cut open the meat to see if it’s done

Let us know what you think should be on the list and email us at [email protected]

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