It was in the early hours of a sunny morning in May 1990 in Citrus Heights CA., my mother decided to excuse herself from school and go visit an 18-year-old long-haired Rocker she met working at Wendy’s. He awoke to a knock on his bedroom window to discover 17-year-old blond girl staring back at him. This is the setting for creating Kyle. Me describing my own conception may be considered wrong or even illegal in several states so we’ll just skip to December 17, 1990. In a building that is now a Mental asylum; the culmination of two teenage lovers’ decision to act out a Marvin Gay song changed the lives of many people and altered the course of history. I was birthed at then, American River Hospital in Carmichael, CA. while Mom was on Christmas break her senior year of high school and Dad was trying to figure out what in the hell to do.
Mom and Dad got married and I became a Navy brat. Exactly 18 months to the day after my birth my sister was born. She tormented me in our very early years. She’d pull my hair and tell me I couldn’t have a crossbow, repeatedly! She did however become my closest friend to this day. During the rise of this new thing called the internet, my sister and I became quite the keyboard terrorists. I’m pretty sure as young kids we started the phenomenon known as catfishing. If you messed with either of us or our family members, chances were, you’d end up sitting alone all day on a park bench with flowers and a stuffed bear, waiting for a super-hot girl named Allie, who never showed or print out your dads Megan’s law report and pass it around school. Dick move? Maybe. Was it worth it? You bet your ass it was.
Mom and Dads divorce finalized in 1997. Surprise, right? Two teenagers with kids couldn’t make it work. Cool thing was, they were both very active and involved in our lives. We even got a pair of younger brothers out of the deal. Mom with her new husband and Dad with his new wife. Best part of it all, TWO CHRISTMASES!!! Thanks Mom and Dad. Nothing beats getting an Ipod and a Dirt bike for Christmas as they routinely tried to out do each other come holidays and birthdays.
I was active as a kid. I played one game of soccer. Decided I hated it and stopped. That made time for my true passion. BMX Racing. Many nights and almost every weekend at a dirt track somewhere in Northern California racing bikes. I raced from 8 to 13 years old. I still miss it to this day. One night when I was 13, I ran my mouth to an 18-year-old gang banger. I know, big surprise there. He attacked me. My dad got involved and we ended up having to move after that. Dad put me in Karate the day after the incident so I could learn to defend myself and watch my tongue. I trained in Kosho Shorie Ryu Kempo for 4 years. I learned a lot from Martial Arts.
Enough about my spoiled childhood and family. Let’s talk about what you came here for. MORE KYLE! I went to a hippie charter school. They called it Waldorf Method, I called it hippie meth-head. I was not a fan. It really prepared me for life at Mesa Verde High School in Citrus Heights, CA. as I barely graduated. It came down to the final moments of my senior year before we confirmed that not only did, I graduate, but was able to join my class and walk the stage. My parents were so proud. There were murmurs of me calling in excused absences through out the year. I wasn’t aware they printed that info on your report card. My dad told me they do that and then took my car. He also found A LOT of Pot and paraphernalia in said car when he confiscated it. Mom thinks this is why I under achieved in school and says it had nothing to do with the Hippie school.
While in HIGH school, I joined the work force tossing pizzas, salads and blunt wrappers out the widow of my 1993 Toyota Tercel. Like a boss. Pizza delivery is the best job a teenaged stoner can ask for. It was the end all be all of existence. Pizza, Parties, Pot, underage drinking at work, tips and more Pizza. That’s what I thought until I discovered bartending. Bigger tips, more drinking, more pot and of course, Hot girls who like to party. If you’re wondering, I started bartending after I graduated high school. C’mon people keep up. In between pizza and bartending, I went to American River College and worked for my Commercial Music Business Degree. While doing this, I worked for my dad for free beer. He made me cart heavy speakers and lighting equipment from venue to venue helping set up and tear down for one of his bands or running live sound and lighting for local bands. I started bartending at a small bar in Galt, CA. where the old man was the house sound guy.
While in college and humping heavy gear for beer I started dabbling in radio. Dad had an internet radio station that focused on local and unsigned artists. Recipe for success right there. It cost more than it ever made but we had fun and made many friends in the Sacramento Music scene. I got the afternoon slot and I had my own show called afternoon alternative. I played Grunge, 90s alternative and guess who else I played. You wanted the best, you got the best. The hottest band in the world. KISS! I did that until I moved the Hawaii. Hawaii, where I spent the first 4 months commuting 6 hours by shoe and bus to and from crappy serving job after crappy serving job. Not only pissing off tourists but the locals as well. After 10 months of giving it a go on a remote island in the pacific, you could say I caught Island Fever. I then packed up my clothes and guitar and moved back to good ole Sacramento. So, friends, it’s taken three pages to get us to where it all really starts. That’s still about 7 pages less than Rob and Dawns Bios.
Before moving to Hawaii, I had applied at 98 Rock in Sacramento for an internship. They must have known I was taking a 10 month leave of absence because they called me right after I returned home from Hawaii. I took the internship and immediately pissed everyone off because the program director for 94.7 recognized my name and made me his assistant. Dad still says he had nothing to do with it. Talk about privileged. I worked in promotions constantly pissing off my supervisor. Apparently drinking on the snow bus and smoking Pot at Aftershock is frowned upon as an intern. Andy Hawk rescued me and gave me a job in programming. Sushi lunches with record labels and free tickets to concerts. This is what I was born for. I was offered and took a job as the morning board operator for the RAD show. Probably the most definitive moment of Brandon and Robs life as I stumbled into it. For 10 months I dragged myself out of bed at 4am to sit in a dark studio where I would try to stay awake and fire off commercials on the station side of the show. Wasn’t all bad because I was getting paid to listen to the #1 show in northern California and Nevada.
On October 14, 2020, at 11:14am I received and text from a number that said, “Maybe Rob Williams.” It said’ “Kyle, we hear good things about you over at the 98 Rock. Especially your entertaining nature on the Snow Bus….” No. It didn’t say any of that. Rob asked me to come in and discuss working with him. I consulted my dad and he said immediately, “Why are you calling me? Hang up and call him back and say YES!!!” I did. The only time I ever did what my dad said, and it worked out. Weird. Now I am on the number 1 Radio show still pissing off tourists and the locals. The true upside is, I make enough money to be able to afford wet cat food for my unappreciative jerk of a cat Karl. He even gets to eat with lights on. I don’t pay the power bill. BOSS MOVE!
Thank you all for listening and if you see me at a concert, feel free to come up and say hi, or buy me a beer. I may be tall but I’m friendly, unlike short people.