For us gals who wish we had children this can be a rough time of year but it doesn’t have to be.
For MANY years this time of year brought out joy and sadness in me. Joy cause ummm duh its Christmas time!! Sadness cause well it’s also a Season for kids. Getting a Christmas tree, decorating the tree, buying presents, school Holiday performances, ice skating, making cookies, taking the kiddos to see Santa…of course these are all things adults can do without children, except for seeing Santa or showing up at a school holiday performance, that would just be weird! But when you want kids these things seem to have a piece missing when you do them with just adults…the kid piece.
I’ve been blessed with nieces, nephews, a great niece and great nephew (yes even my nieces have had children before me!!!lol!! I can laugh about that now!) So throughout my life I’ve been able to experience Christmas a bazillion times thru the eyes of children, which I am grateful for however when those children aren’t yours it can be joyful and painful all at once.
There were times I just wanted to have my husband and I go to some cabin in Wyoming for the Holidays and hide out just he, I and whatever livestock was grazing in the pastures! And not have to see families. Not have to hear Moms talk about all their Mom stuff they are doing over the holidays. Some saying it with excitement and some with annoyance, which is much worse by the way. When you want to be a Mom and you hear a Mom bitching about her Mom duties you just want to look at her and go ‘really did you think it wasn’t gonna be a pain in the ass, hello having children is a big pain in the ass newsflash, and you should enjoy every pain in the ass moment you have! I think it’s just something that Moms like to do complain about being a Mom and guess what it may be really annoying right now, but someday when those of us that want to be Moms are Moms we will join right in on the bitching!!!!! Lol!!
My point in all this is it’s okay if this time of year is rough for you. Allow yourself time to be sad, to feel the emptiness to feel the loss. But also make sure to notice and be aware of all your blessings. You might not be a Mom this Christmas Season but that doesn’t mean you don’t get to feel joy and happiness this time of year. It’s all around you and I know you know it is, we just sometimes get caught up in the sadness of not having children and there are moments that’s okay and then we need to get back to the life we have right now and be in each precious moment.
I NEVER consciously thought I would be 46 with no children. Never. But I am. I can either allow this time of year to bring out the sadness of that or I can count each and every blessing that I do have in every single loving person that’s in my life. I choose to do that and I will savor that this time of year and I hope you choose to do the same.